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Rumah Kedua

2011-12-13T04:44:00.000-08:00

Saya punya rumah kedua sekarang. :)

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Perubahan Perubahan dan Perubahan

2011-12-13T01:46:00.000-08:00

Agustus 2011. Itu kali terakhir saya menuangkan pikiran saya di sini. Kali terakhir saya menuangkan sebagian kebahagiaan saya di dunia nyata bersama kalian ... teman-teman yang masih sangat aktif menuliskan blog.

Sekarang ... Desember 2011. Sudah empat bulan berlalu. Rasanya tak cukup waktu dan kata-kata yang bisa saya tuangkan dalam satu blog kecil ini. Lagipula, saya yakin tak ada orang yang ingin membaca blog yang terlalu panjang.

Tapi, empat bulan yang telah saya lalui di tahun ini ... benar-benar sangat berarti. Ada satu kata yang bisa merangkum semua yang terjadi kepada saya dengan sangat baik dan saya telah menorehkan kata itu, tidak hanya sekali, namun tiga kali, pada judul blog ini. Ya. Perubahan.

Empat bulan yang saya lalui benar-benar mengubah saya. Sebagian orang akan mengetahui penyebabnya dengan sangat baik, sementara yang lain harus memuaskan diri dengan suatu kesimpulan sederhana dari saya: Perubahan itu membuat saya menjadi lebih baik.

Lebih baik. Menurut saya. Jadi, ya, perkataan itu bersifat subyektif. Saya tak tahu dan, mungkin, tak peduli bagaimana orang lain melihat perubahan yang terjadi dalam diri saya. Satu hal yang saya tahu pasti, saya menyukai diri saya yang sekarang, hasil suatu perubahan, dan mensyukuri perubahan itu.

Hal ini membuat saya berpikir. Lagi-lagi perubahan terjadi dalam kehidupan saya. Lagi-lagi perubahan itu terjadi kepada diri saya. Lagi-lagi saya tak bisa menghindar dari perubahan. Apakah setiap manusia memang tidak akan pernah bisa tidak berubah?

Manusia itu dinamis, saya pernah mendengar kata-kata itu di suatu tempat, dinamis dan tak pernah mau diam di tempat awal mereka. Mereka selalu ingin bergerak menuju tempat yang lebih baik dari mereka. Mungkin hal inilah yang menyebabkan perubahan menjadi suatu hal mutlak tak terelakkan di kehidupan manusia.

Perubahan dapat terjadi dengan mudah--nyaris tanpa kita sadari--atau dengan proses yang sulit dan, tak jarang, menyakitkan. Saya rasa ... kedua perubahan tersebut memiliki peranan yang berbeda dalam membentuk atau menghancurkan seseorang. Kedua perubahan itu juga, mungkin saja, tak diharapkan, namun sekali lagi, kita tetap tidak akan bisa menghindarinya.

Dan ... dari seluruh perubahan yang saya alami selama hidup saya yang masih tergolong baru ini, mungkin perubahan selama empat bulan inilah yang memberikan makna terdalam kepada saya. Proses perubahan yang memakan kesabaran, kekuatan dan keikhlasan selama diri saya perlahan bermetamorfosis menjadi saya yang sekarang.

Jadi, terima kasih.

Terima kasih kepada kalian yang menyebabkan saya berubah. Terima kasih kepada kalian yang ada dan terus mendukung saya dalam proses yang saya anggap telah mendewasakan diri saya itu. Terima kasih kepada satu-satunya Sang Pendengar yang telah memberikan jawaban tidak melalui kata-kata, namun melalui pemahaman dan kesunyian. Terima kasih kepada kalian yang telah hadir, singgah dan melewati hati saya.

Perubahan itu memang menyakitkan, saat itu, namun bukan hanya saya yang terluka dan rasa sakit itu adalah suatu tanda bahwa saya bisa menjadi lebih baik lagi.

Terima kasih. Sekali lagi.

Another Year, Another Lifetime

2010-08-10T04:25:00.001-07:00

That is not my cake... mine is a Tiramisu. :9

Anyway! Another year has pass by for me. Today is my birthday so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! Hha. Another year has passed, another lifetime gone by. Will I change for the better today, or will I stay stuck on this stage and never be better? I don't know for now but I'm sure want to change. At least, I hope I can change for the better. :)

I'm grateful for Allah, Who still gives me a chance to live in this beloved--yet corrupted--Earth. My birthday this year is quite special since the day after is the first day of Ramadhan! It's such a pleasure to be able to taste Ramadhan once again... :)

Beside that, this is the first time I celebrate my birthday away from my family! It feels a little bit sad but my friends surprised me with cake and presents... so I must say that this day is so special. I still can't believe my friends did all that for my birthday and frankly, now I'm a little bit worry about what will I give to them for their birthday! Hopefully my presents will be special for them too. :)

Otot Jantung

2010-07-14T06:12:00.000-07:00

Otot jantung memiliki ciri-ciri:

Memiliki sarkomer
Inti hanya satu di tengah
Autoritme (bisa mengatur ritmenya sendiri)
Potensial aksinya lebih lama dari otot lurik
Nerupakan contoh otot viseral (single unit)
Memiliki Tubulus-T yang lebih besar dari otot-otot lainnya
Memiliki mitokondria yang lebih banyak
Memiliki difus interkalaris yang berfungsi untuk memisahkan sel-sel otot jantung yang satu dengan yang lainnya.

Salah satu ciri dari otot jantung adalah memiliki gerak Sinsitium yang berarti apabila satu sel otot terkena sinyal, maka semua sel akan terkena pula. Hal ini dibutuhkan karena otot jantung harus terus bekerja, bahkan di saat kita dalam kondisi tidak sadar.

Otot jantung juga memiliki suatu Autoregulasi Intrinsik atau kemampuan otot jantung untuk mencentuskan sinyal syaraf dari jantung itu sendiri. Autoregulasi intrinsik ini dapat terjadi karena adanya Simpul Sinoatrial (Simpul S-A) pada jantung. Simpul S-A inilah yang merupakan pencetus impuls pada jantung. (pemacu jantung)

Hubungan EKG dengan Siklus Jantung

EKG atau Elektrokardiogram adalah suatu alat yang dapat digunakan untuk melihat pengaruh perbedaan potensial listrik pada jantung. EKG mencatat kedepolarisasian otot jantung yang lalu digambarkan sebagai gelombang P, Q, R, S, dan T.
Gelombang P: menggambarkan depolarisasi ATRIUM, sebelum tekanan atrium meningkat. Saat Simpul S-A mengeluarkan impuls syaraf.
Gelombang Q-R-S: menggambarkan depolarisasi Ventrikel. Gelombang R juga menggambarkan jantung sebelum timbulnya sistolik (kontraksi ventrikel).
Gelombang T: menggambarkan keadaan repolarisasi Ventrikel -> ventrikel kembali seperti semula. Muncul sebelum akhir kontraksi.

Lapisan otot jantung:

Epikardium: bagian membran terluar dari otot jantung
Miokardium: bagian tengah, merupakan otot jantung itu sendiri, bertanggung jawab untuk terjadinya kontraksi
Endokardium: lapisan bagian paling dalam, yang kontak dengan darah.

Cardiac Arrythmias (Kelainan Otot Jantung):

Takikordia: Ritme jantung meningkat
Bradikordia: Ritme jantung menurun
Sinus arrhythmia: Ritme jantung berubah 5% sampai 30% saat pernapasan
Kontraksi prematur atrium: interval antara satu degup jantung dengan degup jantung selanjutnya berkurang.

Kontraksi Otot

2010-07-14T05:49:00.000-07:00

Sistematika Kontraksi Otot:

Adanya hubungan syaraf-otot menimbulkan impuls dari syaraf yang mengakibatkan neurotransmitter mengeluarkan Asetilkolin. Asetilkolin itu sendiri nantinya akan dilepaskan kepada reseptor otot melalui celah sinaps. Asetilkolin bergerak dari pra-sinaps menuju pasca-sinaps.
Setelah Asetilkolin berikatan dengan reseptor otot, akan terjadi suatu potensial aksi sehingga otot terdepolarisasi sehingga Retikulum Sarkoplasma akan mengeluarkan ion kalsium. Ion kalsium tersebut kemudian akan dibawa ke serabut otot melalui Tubulus-T (Tubulus transfer).
Ion Kalsium kemudian akan berikatan dengan active side troponin dari Aktin. Active side ini sebelumnya memiliki posisi yang tertutup (terhalang) dengan tropomiosin, sehingga tidak dapat terjadi aktifitas sliding antara aktin dan miosin. Saat ion Kalsium berikatan dengan active side, maka kepala miosin akan mengubah konformasinya sehingga active side tidak lagi terhalang (terbuka) dan dapat terjadi sliding antara aktin dan miosin.
Kontraksi terjadi saat terjadi aktivitas sliding antara aktin dan miosin dengan bantuan ATP.

Berdasarkan penjabaran di atas, maka dapat diambil kesimpulan bahwa faktor-faktor yang berpengaruh pada proses kontraksi otot adalah:

Adanya impuls dari syaraf yang merupakan pencetus awal pengeluaran Asetilkolin pada neuromuscular junction.
Adanya ion kalsium dalam konsentrasi cukup yang dikeluarkan oleh Retikulum Sarkoplasma
Adanya ATP yang berfungsi untuk membantu proses sliding aktin dan miosin.
Aktin dan Miosin.

Sistematika kontraksi otot ini berlaku untuk semua otot, baik otot lurik, otot polos maupun otot jantung. Hanya saja, terdapat beberapa perbedaan, seperti:

Untuk otot lurik, kontraksi otot ini dilakukan secara sadar, jadi impuls syaraf berasal dari sistem syaraf somatis sedangkan untuk otot polos maupun otot jantung, kontraksi otot dilakukan tanpa disadari, sehingga impuls syarafnya berasal dari sistem syaraf autosomal.
Pada otot jantung, terdapat suatu autoregulasi intrinsik, yaitu Nodus S-A yang dapat menghantarkan impuls sendiri, sehingga jantung tidak harus mendapatkan impuls syaraf dari sistem syaraf autosomal untuk berdetak. Jantung memiliki alat pemacu detaknya sendiri.
Sebagian besar otot polos dan otot jantung memiliki hubungan syaraf difus karena susunan otot mereka adalah viseral yang berarti otot yang berkelompok sehingga apabila satu ujung syaraf otot mendapatkan impuls syaraf, maka impuls syaraf tersebut akan langsung disampaikan ke semua syaraf otot lainnya.

Mirror World 3/3

2010-07-08T11:08:00.000-07:00

Mirror World (3/3)

Disclaimer: See chapter 1

I close my eyes. I’m so tired. My wand is thrown and maybe snapped somewhere. The sky is dark, the ground cold and muddy as rain falls and washes everything; the blood, especially. I smile sardonically. Even the Nature gives such an appropriate setting for the Final Battle.

Dark clouds and raging storms are present just like in the movie cliché while hundreds of wizards and witches battling each other. The smell of flesh burning, the pained screams, and the sight of blood running... it all makes a strange harmony here.

The most beautiful and scary thing though... is the green light. It flashes everywhere. I must have lost my mind when I thought the green flash of Avada Kedavra as a firework. I chuckle slightly and immediately cough soon after. Blood dripping to my chin, falling towards my robe but it doesn’t matter. My robe is black and even it has change colour since the blood matting it is too much.

My stomach is gaping. A Slashing curse. I don’t even know who cast it. It might be Aurors or even my fellow Death Eaters. It doesn’t matter though, because they haven’t taken my life yet. He hasn’t broken his promise yet.

He will never break his promise. I know that.

“Malfoy? Oh Merlin, no. Malfoy? Malfoy?!”

Ah... see? I know he will never break his promise.

I open my eyes and his scar is the first thing I see. Ironic. He is kneeling besides me now, lifting my head gently and placing it on his lap. His face is dirty with blood and mud and soot. There is blood dripping from his cheek and his glasses is crooked. I do wonder how it can still be in place.

“Malfoy?! Come on! Don’t die!”

He sounds so scared... so afraid. For what though? This is my Fate, Harry. I’ve told you so. You sappy Gryffindor should have learn to look at reality by now, shouldn’t you?

“Wait, Malfoy... Snape gives me potions, for emergency. I think I still have one left. Please don’t die yet, please...”

You are rambling, Harry. Silly Gryffindor, always caring too much about other people.

“...ry...” I can’t even speak properly, how shameful. I lift a shaky hand to touch his face. It’s quite an effort and soon after, my hand falls back, having not enough strength to keep it lifted.

“keep... promise.” I hope he understands.

I watch him closely and can tell the exact moment he understand what I mean. His eyes widened and what colour left on his face is gone. He is as pale as a dead body now. Maybe almost as pale as me.

...Heh, it’s a bad joke.

“No, no Malfoy. You’re not going to die! I- I can’t keep that promise!! No...”

Oh no, Harry. You do. You can keep the promise. I’m sure you can.

I stare at your green eyes. My lips aren’t moving from their small smile. I know you will be able to keep the promise, you just need a moment to defeat your denial.

“Malfoy... D-Draco...”

Ah, you sneaky little bastard. How dare you using my first name at this time. That’s worthy a Slytherin, Harry.

“Draco... I... I’m so sorry...”

Warm lips descended to mine. I can taste the salty tears from Harry and I don’t think it will be bad even it is going to be the last thing I taste.

“I lo...ve you, Ha...ry.” I’m sorry, Harry but I can’t let go before I tell you that. I’m so sorry.

Your eyes are closed when you point your wand at me. I can see tears running freely on your cheek and then, I can see the tip of your wand glowing green. Ah... so the firework will begin soon. I wish it’ll be so pretty.

“...Avada Kedavra.”

The firework goes off.

I close my eyes in gratitude...because Harry has fulfilled his promise.

I just wish... next time I open my eyes, I will be at the Mirror World.

-0-

~Fin

Mirror World 2/3

2010-07-08T11:05:00.000-07:00

Mirror World (2/3)

Disclaimer: See chapter 1

-0-

When I read though, I forget about the Mirror World. It doesn’t matter what book I read, it’ll always hold my full attention. You see, I really love to read. I longed for new knowledge, especially about Potion, Charms, and Runes. Yes, I do study, unlike your assumption that I bribe the professors to get my marks.

I’ve probably read as much books as Granger has, if not more since I have more access than her.

I lost myself in the book once I’m reading. I have no time to worry about my surroundings, much less about an imaginary world. Maybe that’s why I often spend my time at the library. Every free time, my friends know where to find me. I even skipped dinner sometimes, only because I’ve found an interesting book.

My friends never bothered me once I enter library. Crabbe and Goyle certainly are allergic to book and knowledge so there’s no way they will follow me there and the other Slytherins know it was useless to accompany me since I’ll immediately lost in my own world, not responding to whatever they said.

That’s why, I was surprised when someone suddenly yanked the book I’m currently reading away from me.

“Hey! What—“ my complain dies in my throat once I see that you are the one who stole the book .

You have frown on your face as you read the book title, do you know that? Your nose wrinkles so slightly, almost like you don’t believe anyone will ever want to read the book.

“Advance Potion, Extreme Potions for Masters.” You mumbled, reading the title out loud while raising an eyebrow to me. Your green eyes shine with amusement. I just can’t stand not teasing you when you give me such a blatant challenge like that.

“What,” I drawled, my usual smirk ready on place. “just because you don’t have enough brain to read it, doesn’t mean everybody cant, Potty. I, unlike you, am very capable of making potion after all.”

You actually surprised me when you reply my smirk with your own. “Git.” You muttered but that word hold no venom at all. “No wonder you are Snape’s favourite student. Although, I still can’t see why anybody will want to stay for such a long time making stinky and gooey liquid.” You wrinkled your nose again in disgust and I must keep my smile hidden.

“You just say that because you’re jealous that I’m better at Potion than you.” I answered nonchalantly. I heard you snort disbelievingly and glared. I straighten my back, ready to confront you seriously this time.

“So what are you doing here alone, Potty? Where are your sidekicks?”

You shrugged, completely unaffected by my glare and I sneered hatefully at you. “Don’t sneer at me like that, Malfoy. Honestly, I do wonder if you could make out any other expressions other than that, sometimes.” He sighed and flopped himself down on the chair right across mine.

I scowl. “Who gives you permission to sit there, Scar-head?” I sneered. The nerve of him, sitting there and relaxing like we are friends!

“Oh, cool off, Malfoy. This is a library, I don’t need anyone’s permission to sit.”

“You need it if you were sitting across from me.” I replied in a hiss. Sometimes you can bring the worst of me without even trying, you know that? Simple remarks from you and then I’ll feel very mad. You don’t care though. You never do care about anything that I said and I don’t know why, but it hurts. Merlin, it hurts so much that I can hate you more just because of that.

“Well then, if you said so, may I sit here, Malfoy?” You ask me, but your voice and your eyes make it a challenge. What you mean to say is, “Are you afraid if I sit here?” and I know it perfectly why you said it like that. I never can back down from a challenge, especially not one from you.

“I’d rather not be disturb by your moronic actions and stupid bed head actually, Potty.” I snap. Your eyes narrow dangerously now and I can almost see your temper rising. Ah, so the Gryffindor is still short-tempered after all. Nothing like the cool snake.

You let out a small sigh, almost unrecognizable if I am not watching you so closely. Your eyes shine with... disappointment that quickly being replaced with anger and I feel my heart shatter... again. “Whatever, Malfoy. You’re such a git. I wonder why I bother.”

I can only watch as you stand up brusquely, your hands are fisted until your knuckles are white but you shove them into your pockets where no one can see how hard you control yourself.

For what, though? What are you controlling yourself for, Potter? Do you restraining yourself for hitting me? For yelling at me? Or is it something else...?

I can feel my temper rises too. I don’t know why, but you make me feel humiliated by nothing at all. I stand up and before knowing it, I am shouting at you.

“Yes, you shouldn’t bother with me, Potter! After all, I’m just a junior Death Eater am I not? I’m totally worthless compare to the Saviour, am I not?!” I can hear myself chuckling without humour. “Oh Mighty Potty, you just can’t help it when you see a poor, misguided children like me, can you? You are hoping you can take me to your side, fighting the Dark Lord. You are hoping I will leave my Family so easily just to help you doing what is right,”

You are turning around now, green eyes blazing as dangerously as magic swirls around you. You are always so powerful, you know? You can’t control your power though, that’s why it’s swirling so dangerously... so beautifully around you whenever you’re mad, just like now.

“Malfoy...”

Your voice is a mere hiss of dangerous snake, a warning for a fool like me. I ignore it though, just like you who never care about what I said, I will not give a knut for what you said either.

“Well you know what, Potty? Tough shite! I will not do it! I will not abandon my Family just to save the Wizarding World because you know what? I don’t care about the World where my Family dies. I don’t think you can understand though. After all, you never do know what FAMILY feels like, do you?!”

I know I overstep the border almost as soon as I said that, but I never realize when you’re moving. Next thing I know, my head bumps against something hard and the sound of books falling from their shelf can be heard around me. I shut my eyes with a hiss. A dull throb is starting and I feel a little bit dizzy.

“Shut your trap, Malfoy,” you hiss so lowly and yet, I feel fear run along my body by that sound. “You do not know anything about me. You do not know anything about what I want so you can shut your trap now about all of your self-pity and petty assumption because you know what? You worth nothing. NOTHING at all. You and your family. You all are beyond redemption and I don’t even know how I can think otherwise.”

Your green eyes pierce into my silver ones. They are so bright, but from this close, I can see small flecks of brown contaminating the green. Ah, so your eyes aren’t truly your mother eyes at all. Your father is also shown there.

“If I do worth nothing, then why are you still here...?” my voice is a whisper. I don’t know why I bother to lower my voice since if Madame Pince has not come to throw us out yet when you throw me against a book shelf, it can only mean that you are casting a Silencing Charm. Wandless and Wordless Silencing Charm.

Something flickers in your eyes and your hands loosened slightly. “I don’t know.” You murmur. “I don’t know why. Maybe I just don’t want to kill you. The thought of you... on the other side of war... the thought of me, holding and pointing my wand to you on the Final Battle... Killing curse on our lips...” your voice broke and you take a shaky breath.

I see you then. Truly seeing you. Do you want to know what I see? I don’t see a man who can save our World. I don’t see a Hero. I see a boy, a small boy who is torn by responsibility. A boy who wants nothing of his role, yet unable to escape from it. I see myself in you. I see Harry behind the Hero.

“We can’t escape though, Harry.” I whisper.

Your eyes widened as you stare at me. Astonish by me using your first name, I guess. I give you a small smile because just this time... just this one time, I’d rather think this is the mirror world where I can show you all my feelings. No more hiding, no more masks.

“We can’t escape from our fate, Harry,” I continue, hands moving to cup your face so tenderly. “You will beat the Dark Lord. I will become a Death Eater. We will fight each other. That is our fate.” You close your eyes, almost like you want to block the words. “But Harry... if I have to die, I want to die by your hands, by your wand.”

“My life is an expensive thing, Potter. No one deserves to take it. No one... except for you.”

A tear run down your face, Harry. Do you know that it hurts me when I see that? You’re so beautiful, Harry and yet... you’re holding such a big responsibility that it breaks you. Can’t your friends see it, Harry? Can’t they see that you’re breaking? Maybe they see it, but you just can’t let them in, can you? Because they won’t understand... because they are not being pushed by the same responsibility.

“Harry Potter, promise me.” I tilt your chin with my index finger. Your green eyes—glassy because of the tears—beg to me for something... anything. I just smile. For as vulnerable as you are, Harry, I don’t think I’ve ever see you stronger than this. “Promise me Harry Potter, that you won’t let anyone but you to take my life.”

You open your mouth. I can see you trying to object it but then you see my eyes. You stare into them, entering my soul and searching whatever answer you need for your question. Then finally you sigh.

Your forehead touches mine when you whispered, “I promise” with such a broken voice I can’t help but cry silently.

-0-

TBC

Mirror World 1/3

2010-07-08T10:53:00.000-07:00

~Erised is Desire~

Title: Mirror World (1/3)

Rating: T

Pairing: Light Harry/Draco

Summary: Draco thinks of a Mirror World

Warnings: Kissing, some blood, minor cursing

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter and co. They belong to J.K Rowling and various publisher including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoat Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Mirror World

Sometimes, when I see my reflection on the mirror, I let my mind wanders. As I study the young man with platinum blonde hair that always groomed meticulously perfect and eyes like molten silvers, my imagination will work out. Then, the sharp and high cheek-bones will be lifted as pouty red lips—too pouty to be a man’s—morphed into a very rare smile.

I will hold the smile before studying the reflection again. I look different. With a genuine smile replacing the usual hate sneer and mischievous, almost naughty twinkles on my otherwise ice cold eyes, I look...happy. Like a normal boy.

Something that a Malfoy isn’t allowed to be. Malfoys are not normal.

Then I’ll pretend that the world behind mirror exist. A world that is identical and yet so very different from this world. I’ll entertain myself that in that world, Draco Malfoy is a happy, normal boy. Draco Malfoy doesn’t have to hide his true face, is allowed to show his emotions—crying, laughing, angry, jealously, loving—instead of killing them.

I’ll imagine the mirror Draco put his uniform hastily because he was late, like any normal teenagers, and in the haste, forget to button his white shirt and of course, the tie was made very poorly. It was a total opposite to what I’m doing, straightening my already-straight-robes, with an underside shirt that was chocking me, and knotting my tie perfectly.

Mirror Draco will, in my imagination, huffed at his bedside head and simply ran a hand through it, not putting so many spells only to make sure there’s not even one strand of hair that was out of place.

The other me will grin at his reflection then—at me—and nod in satisfaction for all of his imperfection, for all messy appearances he’d maintain to gain, before slinging his bag lazily over his shoulder and walking out. Ready to face another normal day as a normal boy.

I’ll stand there, in front of the mirror still, the smile fell from my face. My trademark sneer taking its place again. I look at the reflection of a perfectly dressed young man with cold eyes and I snarl.

Because for all the imperfections mirror Draco’s shown, he is still perfectly normal. So very true, not fake, like me.

I envy him for that.

-0-

I’ll imagine that Mirror World again whenever you bumped me at school. Of course, it’s not always you who bumped me first. Actually, most of times it was me who bumped you and then sneered.

Accusing you for something that was completely my fault is what I do almost every day.

You’ll sneer back at me, of course. You are a Gryffindor, they are known for their quick temper. Even your house’s colour indicates it. Red always makes people more aggressive.

I’ll taunt you for your “Poor excuse of a sneer, even a baby can do better than that,” in my perfect mocking tone. My friends will laugh and your friends will be outraged. I can see Weasley’s face reddening dangerously and Granger looks like she will burst a steam over her ears soon.

We never care about them though, do we? No. Whenever we meet, it almost like no one else matters. Sure, they are all around us, laughing, sneering, adding the background noises—not music because music is nice and their sounds are not—but that’s what they are, isn’t it? Background. This is our play, where we are the main star. I know it and you know it also.

Insulting Weasley gives me no thrill at all. He is too easily worked up it’s not even worth it. I can simply greet him, without any bad intention and his face will turn an ugly shade of red, accusing me for plotting something evil. What a laugh!

No, I’m always only attracted by you. You. No one else. At first, I don’t even know why I bother. Maybe because you are ignoring me. No Malfoys take ignorance well. As time passed by though, I start to question myself, is it really the reason? Just because you ignored me, I was acting like a five year old with a temper tantrum. I realized there must be something else.

Then I’ll back to wonder about the Mirror World. Every time we meet, we confront each other. With each confrontation, I start to feel different. I think different. Whilst I usually think what insult will hurt you best, now I think of how your eyes will blaze when they glare at me. When I was supposed to think where I should punch you, I realized how hard your muscles are instead. When I looked down at you, I was thinking of how fast you’ve grown, you’re almost catching my height.

Above all that though, I notice a small glimpse of amusement in your eyes whenever we insult each other. You make it almost like a banter. A silly banter between two friends; Friends who know each other best because they are so similar.

I’ll wonder then, whether you also have your other you in the Mirror World or not. I like to imagine you do though. Then... I dare hope that mirror you and mirror me are friends. Like what should have happened when we first met, when you reject my friendship.

I usually imagine that when we are at class, History of Magic, actually. I will imagine you sat beside me in the Mirror World, complaining about the boring class—although maybe in the Mirror World, the class is interesting—or how you really hate Crabbe’s snore.

I’ll imagine Mirror me chuckling at your sentences, agreeing about the class and the snores and then telling you some random jokes. I hope Mirror me is funny though. I like being funny with my wits.

What I really love to imagine is your smile though. I thought that since Mirror you and Mirror me are friends, then you’ll openly laughed at my joke, snickered at my silly brags, chuckled at my embarrassment. Even here, in this world where we’re not friends, I always love your smiles. I’m looking for your laughs, struggling to catch your chuckles.

Even here, where we are enemy, your happiness is always affecting me. So I imagine, in the Mirror World, I’ll always be very happy.

-0-

When Father, Lucius, call me to his study, I’ll let my mind wanders to the Mirror World silently. I’ll keep my face blank and give responses at times, an act that was mastered by all Malfoys since they were toddler. Occasionally I’ll focus back to Lucius. I’ll study him. He looks very much alike with me. People often say that I was a carbon copy of my Father. They are wrong.

Although I’m almost identical with Lucius, but I am an exact carbon copy of my Mother, Narcissa. Save for the silver eyes though. Lucius’ blonde hair is a shade darker than mine. Of course, with the light playing at them, it is a very difficult difference to be seen. There are still some more visible differences though, like my body is leaner than Lucius. My fingers are longer, like a pianist’s fingers. My movements are gracefully flowing, like air, wind. Lucius’ movements are gracefully demanding, like water, strong and noticeable.

The most basic difference though: I have feelings still, like my Mother. I’m sure my Father’s feelings were gone since the first time he bow low to the Dark Lord.

That is another reason I love to wonder about the Mirror World. I imagine there’s nothing like Voldemort there. I imagine my Father is normal, like any Father. He will praise me when I got good scores, he won’t be disgust to hug me when I was a little boy. He won’t push me to bow low to a madman and reduce myself into a slave.

I amuse myself in thinking that in the Mirror World, my Father will love me. Total opposite from the real condition.

But again, I think that’s not good, is it? If everything is total opposite then that means my Mother will be bad! No, I can’t let that happened! Mother is someone whom I truly respect. People thought I respect Lucius, idolized him even. Yet, there’s nothing more inaccurate than that.

I was forced to respect Lucius. Through fear. Through mind-numbing pain of Cruciatus Curse. Through my own ear-splitting scream. Only crazy people will actually idolize him. But only a crazier man dares to disobey him after so much pain.

Of course, thinking like that means that I think you are crazy, crazier than me even. Who can blame me though? You are really insane with all of your courage. I can’t even start to imagine how it feels to face a man that has kill your parents. How was it, duelling with the strongest Dark Lord alive when you are only a teenager? How can you keep your wits when you’re facing a Basilisk in a mere age of twelve?

Yes, you are crazy in my eyes. Yet, all of your craziness just attracts me even more.

Sometimes, I really hope Mirror World exist. I will trade anything in prospect to be friend with you. Sometimes though, I’m glad it doesn’t exist.

Yes, I contradict myself. That’s what makes me intriguing for you, isn’t it?

-0-

...continue to part 2

Chocolate Sprinkle

2010-07-06T19:31:00.000-07:00

Another challenge Fic for Ovi! This is to compensate for the loooooong time. Hhe. :D

Hope you enjoy~!

Chocolate Sprinkle

“What’s that?”

Eyebrows raised in disbelieve.

“It’s a Chocolate Genoese Sponge cake!”

A wide smile, bright blue eyes glittered.

“...what?”

A face went pale.

“Oh my, it looks so delicious, Fuji! Did you make this yourself??”

A nod and a red-haired boy grinning widely at the baker while his eyes stared hungrily at the cake.

“What’s the meaning of this, Fuji?”

Cold tone and a glare, sure signs of anger. Brown eyes flashed with emotions: anger, confuse, disbelieve, hurt.

A soft smile, meant to soothe.

“It is your birthday, Tezuka, and since I am a baker, so I don’t think it’s a big thing to give you a cake on your own birthday.”

“You know that I don’t like sweets though.”

A pair of eyes narrowed. An expression of hate shown in a handsome face. Nose wrinkled unconsciously when the words were said.

An exasperated sigh and a small shake of head. “I know, but this is your birthday, so I thought it will be fine this one time... I made this cake special for you, after all. But...” Blue eyes went hiding behind eyelids once a small flash of hurt made them shone brighter than usual. “but obviously, I was wrong. You will not eat anything I cook when it has something with sugar, will you?” a bitter chuckle. “Well, I guess it will be hard for you to eat any of my cooking at all since I am a Baker and my specialty is sweets and pastries.”

“I don’t even know why I bother.”

Another sigh, this one wary and heavy.

Tezuka frowned as he saw his lover’s sad face and mentally berated his self. ‘Stupid! How insensitive you can be, Tezuka? Don’t you see that Syunsuke only want to make something special for you? Of course your arrogance and insensitiveness destroy all of his efforts!’

“Syunsuke, I-“

“No, leave it, Kunimitsu. I know you don’t like sweets...” Fuji chuckled slightly, but there was no

amusement in it. “Actually, I think you hate them. It’s a wonder what a person like you are thinking when you took a pastry baker as your lover.”

The words were harsh and Tezuka couldn’t help the instant defence position that he took. Fuji rarely was upset so when he did... well, let’s just say that even Tezuka wouldn’t be able to calm his lover for a while.

“No, Syunsuke,” Tezuka negated. He refused to let this problem to be another reason for their few fights. Surely this was just too ridiculous for that! “I’m sorry. It was insensitive of me. I shouldn’t overreact like that just because a... chocolate cake,” Tezuka’s face still couldn’t quite hide his disgust for the sweet.

Fuji stared at Tezuka while he apologized and in the end, he just couldn’t help but to chuckle. This time, it was genuine. “I know. Your words shouldn’t hurt me either, actually. I do know you are an insensitive person.” Fuji teased and then smiled when Tezuka huffed in indignation. “Maybe it hurts because I’ve made this cake so carefully only for you and then you reject it.”

“I’m sorry, Syunsuke.” Tezuka moved closer to his lover’s side before wrapping his arms around Fuji’s waist. “Let’s just forget about the argument, okay? I will eat the cake. I’m sure whatever you make will be delicious.”

A soft lips pressed onto Fuji’s lips in a small, almost chaste, kiss then. Fuji sighed delightfully before wrapping his arms around Tezuka’s neck and beginning to kiss back. The small kiss turned into passionate in matter of seconds and soon, Tezuka’s hand were slipping inside of Fuji’s clothes, eagerly mapping the soft skin there.

Both of them were lost in their own world, they didn’t notice one Eiji Kikumaru took a slice of the cake and ate it in high spirit.

They did notice though, when Eiji began shouting in surprise and frantically began searching for water.

The couple watched their friend flailing about before finally grabbing a bottle of water and gulped it hastily.

Tezuka’s eyebrow raised in surprised and he turned back to his lover, only to see that Fuji had a small amused smirk on his face.

“What did you do with the cake, Syunsuke?” he asked.

Fuji’s smirk widened and when he answered, his voice was smug. “Well, since I know that you don’t like sweets, Tezuka... I used wasabi for the filling instead of sugar.”

-0-

The Chocolate Bee

2010-07-06T19:20:00.000-07:00

A/N: This is a challenge fic for Ovi! I just can say this: Sorry it takes so long and that it's still unedited so sorry for the grammar mistakes and typos!

Hope you enjoy! :D

The Chocolate Bee

Syunsuke Fuji awoke with a small smile on his lips. He opened his blue eyes slowly, as if reluctant to leave his dream world, and gazed to the empty spot beside him. The bed was still unmade and the scent of whomever had been sleeping beside the chocolate haired man was still strong.

Sighing ever so slightly, Fuji sat up and rubbed his eyes. The sun was only starting to rise so his room was still quite dark. Fuji stretched his unused muscle before he went out from the bed. The man shivered slightly when his feet touched the cold floor but after the initial contact, the cold was bearable so Fuji stood, intent to take a shower.

His cerulean blue eyes was caught by a small white paper that was placed on his bed table though, so he went to see what the paper is. The same tender smile appeared on his face when he saw first the picture of him, sleeping so soundly and peacefully with his hair spattered around him almost like a halo. He always did this... Fuji thought fondly as he traced the outline of his body on the picture.

Shaking his head with a small chuckle, Fuji set the picture down and took the letter. It was simple, straight-forward and maybe a little bit cold, but it managed to fill the slight emptiness Fuji felt from waking alone.

S

Have to go to work early, the photo shoot was being moved forward.
Will see you later.

K

After reading the letter, Fuji felt more confident to face the day. He took the letter and the picture with him, walked to the drawer and pulled out a wooden box that always was being kept there. Fuji opened the box and put the letter and the picture inside, joining with other pictures and letters from his lover.

“Good luck with your work, Tezuka...” he whispered softly as he closed the box.

-0-

The Chocolate Bee was a small but quite famous local cafee that sold many kind of sweets and light snack. It was opened four years ago and ever since then, it slowly gained its’ popularity since the cakes served there were always delicious.

The Chocolate Bee located just below Fuji’s apartment and it was Fuji’s pride.

Fuji loved his cafee so much. It was his dream to open a shop on his own, preferably something that had a connection with his hobbies: Tennis and baking. He couldn’t open a tennis shop though, since he didn’t know where to get his supplier and frankly, that kind of shop needed too much money.

So Fuji opened The Chocolate Bee. He renovated his small house that was given to him by his parents so that the ground stair could be used as a cafee. His brother helped, grudgingly, redecorating the room and he didn’t need to hire a chef since he himself was going to take that position.

The waitress was the problem, but thakfully, it was one that could be easily solved. He just put an advertisement on their local newspaper and two weeks after his first opening, Fuji had hired two waitresses.

“Good morning, Syu-chan!” A cheery female voice sounded just after the clinking of small bells on the door.

Fuji smiled as he turned around to great his first co-worker. “Good morning, Asahi. You’re here early...” he commented.

Asahi, a 20 years old girl who was still studying at University, grinned widely at him while she walked to the counter and put her bag on top of it. Asahi sat on the chair provided and her legs were swinging back-and-forth.

“Well, it’s Valentine Day today, isn’t it?” At Fuji nod, although he didn’t need to do that since the question was rethorical, Asahi’s grin grew even wider as she continued, “So! I decided that I should come and prepare early since at this day, this place will surely turned into a war zone!”

Fuji chuckled slightly at that. It was true enough. Whenever Valentine Day came, the caffee would be filled with even more people than usual. Most of them school girls who wanted to buy a chocolate for their crushes or boyfriends. They usually ordered their cakes to be taken away though, so it wasn’t so difficult to handle them. Handling the couples was more difficult.

“I think your theory has it merits.” Fuji admitted. “but don’t you have to go to college today, Asahi?” he asked casually, eyeing the black haired girl who was grinning sheepishly. Fuji sighed. Asahi often skipped her class since she prefer to be working at the cafe but Fuji never did agreed to that kind of action.

“I’ve told you that you shouldn’t skip your class or I will fire you, Asahi.” Fuji said in a soft but firm tone.

“Yes, I know that, Syu-chan. I just... well, just this time? Please??” Asahi pleaded, her big black eyes doing their best to imitate a puppy’s eyes. She knew that her co-worker was weak for someone’s begging.

Fuji held eyes with Asahi for about five minutes before his resolution crumpled and with a wary sigh, since this was not the first time Asahi had talked him out of it, he spoke, “Alright. Only this time and this is the last time I heard that sentence. Understand?”

Asahi squealled before she went to hug Fuji tightly. “Understand! Thank you, Syu-chan!” she grinned.

The door’s bell rang at that time and a deep voice floated to the two people inside. “Woah, it’s still morning and you had already molesting Fuji, Asahi? That is unacceptable.”

Asahi and Fuji turned their face to see a man with chocolate hair and brown eyes grinning up at them. At the man’s hands were bags of groceries. Asahi immediately unlatched her hug at Fuji only to glomp at the man.

“Ryuka! You’re here early too!” she squealled, still hanging onto the man’s neck.

“Y-yes, I am early now please get off of me, Asahi, my hands are killing me and you are cutting my air way.” Ryuka said painfully, his face getting paler by the second.

“I apologize for that, Ryuka. Thank you for shopping for me.” Fuji said, coming to take the grocery bags from the man. Ryuka let a relieved sigh at that and he smiled at Fuji. “since you two have been here early, I think we can start cleaning the room soon, hm?”

“Alright.” Ryuka agreed, followed by Asahi soon. “Now, what are you doing here, Asahi? I thought you have a class this morning.” Ryuke frowned, looking at Asahi’s black eyes after he returned her hug.

“She is skipping. Again.” Fuji answered for the man from the kitchen’s direction. He had to start making cakes soon least he would be extremely exhausted by the time he closed the shop. Asahi was right. This place was going to be a war zone soon.

Fuji could barely heard Ryuka’s exclamation of, “What?! Again?!” and he chuckled. Ryuka was the typical of protective boyfriend when it came to Asahi. Asahi’s childish behaviour only strengthened Ryuka’s theory that the girl needed protection.

‘Think about it... Maybe giving them a free valentine cake wouldn’t be a bad idea.” Fuji murmured to himself before happily starting his job to create the mouth-watering cakes.

-0-

It was noon when finally Fuji could take some kind of rest in the kitchen. True to Asahi’s words, the cafee had been turned into something resembling a war ground once they opened for the day. The amount of people—mostly teenagers—that had come and crowding the cafee was unbelievable and Fuji had almost no time at all to even take a deep breath.

“Well, at least this mean a healthy income,” he murmured before chuckling to himself. Fuji swap his face with his hand, uncaring about the floor that surely would be smeared on his cheek as he checked the cakes in the ovens.

“Hmm, it should be done soon.”

No sooner than he straightened up, Fuji saw a flash turned off and he immediately turned to see a man leaning on the kitchen’s door. A slow, pleased smile morphed on Fuji’s face as he took in the man’s appearance.

“This room is staff only, you know that, right?” he teased as he walked closer to the man.

“Really? Pardon me then, but I can’t help it whenever I see a gorgeous subject, I just have to take a picture of them.” The man reply with an arrogant smirk. He was holding a camera on his hands and his eyes glinted amusedly behind stylish glasses. The man looked handsome in black shirt and casual jeans.

“You flattered me too much, Kunimitsu.” Fuji chuckled softly, stopping right in front of Tezuka.

“I merely speak the truth, Syunsuke.” Tezuka retorted, hands automatically went to his lover’s slim waist. “You smell so... sweet today, more so than usual.” Tezuka’s frown seemed to be deepened at that words.

“It’s Valentine Day, My dear.” Fuji answered easily, pecking Tezuka on the lips softly.

“Ah,” Tezuka nodded as if that was a valid answer and it was, at least for him. “Well then, I won’t disturb you any longer and make your lovely cakes overburned. I’ll see you later, Syunsuke.” He leaned forward to lick at the flour on Fuji’s face before kissing him and went out of the room.

Fuji stood there, slightly in daze, while a small smile refused to disappear from his face.

-0-

It turned out that Fuji was utterly busy until it was time to close the cafee. With a small sigh of exhaustion, Fuji walked out from the kitchen.

“Nice work today, Fuji.” Ryuka greeted him once he saw the owner of the cafee. Ryuka’s face looked quite exhausted but the warm smile of his was still attached firmly and sincerely.

“You too, Ryuka.” Fuji returned his employee’s smile before asking, “Where is Asahi?”

“There, slumped in her exhaustion.” Ryuke pointed at the desk near a window where Asahi could be seen sitting—or slumping—in her chair while Tezuka was sitting calmly in front of her. A cup of cofee was held in the man’s hands.

Fuji smiled warmly at the sight. “Well, it had been a long day, huh? You and Asahi can go home early today, no need to help me cleaning up.” He said to Ryuka who nodded his acceptance.

“Thank you, Fuji. I don’t think Asahi can stay awake any longer.” The chocolate haired man chuckled while he followed Fuji to their lovers’ desk.

“Sorry for the long await, Tezuka. Good job today, Asahi.” Fuji said once they had arrived near the desk. He then slipped into a seat besides Tezuka while Ryuka took a free chair since Asahi didn’t seem to be moving anytime soon.

“Hn,” was Tezuka’s simple answer to Fuji’s words. His face expresionless while he drank his coffee while Asahi mumbled something that might or might not be “No problem, Syu-chan.”

“How’s your job, Tezuka?” Fuji enquired with a smile to his lover.

“Not as busy as you.” Tezuka answered calmly. “Oishi helped a lot and the models are... enthusiast to go home early.”

“Oh, how is Oishi by the way? Is he still with Eiji?” Ryuka asked. He had known Oishi and Eiji since they often came to the cafee to visit Fuji. Ryuka especially was taken by Eiji since the red-haired model was so cheerful and easy-going.

Tezuka nodded. “Yes, they are still going strong as usual, although I don’t know what Oishi looked from Eiji.”

“Well, opposite attract, they say.” Ryuka retorted with a small smile.

“Hmm...” Tezuka hummed his acknowledgement.

“Talking about opposite and all, shouldn’t you take Asahi home soon, Ryuka? I’m not even sure she is still awake.” Fuji said softly, looking at the black haired girl whom, surely enough, looked like she was asleep already.

Ryuka took a look at his girlfriend and immediately his eyes softened considerably. “Yes, you’re right. I think it’ll be best if I take her home now.” He then get up from his seat to shake Asahi awake.

The girl groaned and whined but she cracked open an eye to look at her boyfriend’s smiling face.

“Let’s go home, Asahi. You’re dead on your feet as it is.” Ryuka spoke softly, knowing that his girlfriend hated to be awakened from any slumber. True to his words, Asahi pouted.

“Don’t wanna! I am sleepy, Ryu-chan!”

While Ryuka tried to gently coaxed his girlfriend, Fuji stood up from his seat and walked to the kitchen. Tezuka watched his lover go with a raised eyebrow but he received just a wink in return.

Once he had taken what he need, Fuji walked back to the desk only in time to see Ryuka who was holding Asahi bridal style saying something to Tezuka. The chocolate haired boy looked at him when he approached and smiled.

“We’ll be leaving now, Fuji. Asahi is being a kid, she didn’t want to walk home.” He sighed fondly.

“Sure you will be able to hold her until home, Ryuka?” Fuji asked.

“It won’t be a long walk. We’ll take a train and then a cab so actually I will just hold her for about ten minutes walk to the station.” Ryuka laughed.

“You can borrow my car if you want, Ryuka.” Tezuka offered, standing beside Fuji.

“Nah, it’s okay, Tezuka-san. Thank you for the offer, but I’ll be alright.” Ryuka smiled as he adjusted Asahi’s position. “Well then, we’ll take our leave now. I don’t want to disturb your valentine day any longer.” He smirked.

Fuji just chuckled while Tezuka replied Ryuka’s smirk with one of his own. “Alright then, be careful. This is some gift for you two.” Fuji gave a bag to Ryuka who took it with some difficulty. “It’s a free valentine’s cake, to show my gratitude.”

“Oh. Wow, Fuji... you shouldn’t have...” Ryuka looked bewildered.

“Just take it and go home.” Tezuka input.

Ryuka shook his head with a small smile. “Thanks a lot, boss. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He grinned.

-0-

“Finally it’s done.” Fuji heaved a relief sigh as he finished cleaning the kitchen. Tezuka had helped with the main room but Fuji never let him put a hand in the kitchen because it was his domain and he didn’t want anything to be changed from their position.

With a satisfied smile, Fuji walked out from the kitchen and to the main bedroom on the second floor. Tezuka had went there first so he was slightly confused when he saw that the room’s light was off.

“Kunimitsu? What-“ Fuji’s eyes widened as he took in the room’s condition.

Tezuka was sitting on the bed, a small soft smile on his handsome face. The light was turned off and the desks beside the bed was lined up with candles, sending soft lights all around the room. There was an additional desk in the room, which held two candles, a wine bottle, two glasses and various assortments of sweets.

Fuji couldn’t help his chuckle when he saw that the sweets were actually from his own cafee. The strawberry shortcake was there, the chocolate fudge, the oreo soft cake, the caramel pudding... almost all of the sweets was there.

“What is this, Kunimitsu?” Fuji asked in amusement as he stepped into the room and immediately went to Tezuka’s side, bending slightly to give a so deserved kiss from the brown eyed man.

“A celebration. It’s valentine day after all.” Tezuka answered in between their kisses.

“You hate sweet though.” It was a statement, but Fuji’s expression made it an inquiry.

“You didn’t.”

Tezuka’s answer made Fuji smiled and shook his head. People could say that Tezuka was cold and uncaring but deep down, Tezuka was quite romantic and Fuji thanked God for the chance to be able to know that side of Tezuka.

“Well, since you’ve prepared it so nicely, why don’t we eat those sweets?”

Fuji took Tezuka’s hands and dragged him to the additional desk. His cerulean eyes scanned around the sweets and his eyebrow raised when he saw something... quite unusual there.

He turned to Tezuka whose answer was just a small shrug of shoulders. “I don’t like sweets.” He reasoned.

“So you eat it with wasabi? You surely have an unique taste, Tezuka.”

“You like wasabi.”

Fuji’s laughter rang in the room and he smiled warmly at Tezuka.

“Indeed I am.”

The sweets were abandoned for a while then, since both of them were to busy kissing each other in the room filled with candle light. Neither care for the abandoned sweets since they already got the best sweet for Valentine Day after all.

-0-

Sleepy~

2010-05-05T08:44:00.001-07:00

I am sleepy

But I can't sleep

So I write this blog

Just for the sake of it.

OH MY GOD, SHE IS A GENIUS!!

2010-04-22T11:24:00.000-07:00

Oh My God!!! I am speechless!! I am astonished!! I am awed!! I am in LOVE!!!

Honestly, this woman, a Live Journal User under the name of lilithium is a sheer genius! Her arts are so awesome that I have difficulty in breathing every time I see her Draco!! Oh My God!!! *take a deep breath*

For the evidence, here are some of her arts. All credits due to Lilithium, and please don't put the art somewhere else without her permission. :)

A month

2010-04-20T08:42:00.000-07:00

It's been a month! :D

Funny though, I don't meet with him at all today, all today is our first month anniversary.

Ha ha, I don't know why today seems important to me. I mean... usually I never care about this kind of anniversary. There's no need to keep counting how long you have been together, right? The important thing is that you will be together for a long time. :)

But I did remember the date, although he did not. Ha ha! I don't blame him though. :) and I just feel funny that on our anniversary, we didn't meet at all. Not even at college since I skipped my classes today. He he.

Well, I just want to say that I love him. I am quite sure that what I felt to him is no longer a simple 'like' but something stronger and I just want to say that he has made me happy for all of this month. I just hope we can stay together even longer and that there will be more anniversaries in later dates! :D

Haaah, that's so sappy, isn't it?? Geez. He he.

S-A-H-A-B-A-T-?

2010-04-20T08:21:00.000-07:00

Friend is a place where you can come to whenever you're tired.

Hm.... sebenernya, ini bisa dibilang merupakan suatu entri yang cukup klise karena, siapa sih yang ga pernah bertanya-tanya apa itu arti dari sahabat? Siapa sih yang ga pernah menerka apakah mereka itu benar-benar memiliki seorang sahabat atau tidak?

Ya, makanya gw bilang entry ini adalah klise karena lagi-lagi, gw sedang mempertanyakan arti kata sahabat itu.

Awalnya gw mulai ngerasa bingung adalah saat kakak gw berkata bahwa ternyata gw dan seorang teman gw yang udh gw anggap sebagai sahabat, yang bisa dibilang adalah sahabat pertama gw, sebenernya bukanlah sahabat.

Membingungkan, bukan? Well, gw juga waktu itu merasa bingung dan jujur aja, agak tersinggung tapi terus kakak gw mengemukakan alasan-alasan mengapa dia bisa sampai berpikir begitu dan stelah gw renungkan lagi... ternyata alasan yang disebutkan oleh kakak gw itu adalah benar.

Banyak orang bilang bahwa orang yang hanya ada di saat kita senang itu bukanlah teman kita. Tapi... apakah orang yang selalu ada di saat kita sedih sudah bisa dibilang teman atau malah sahabat? Benarkah persahabatan itu hanyalah diukur dari kesediaan orang itu untuk menjadi 'tong sampah' yang mendengarkan segala keluh kesah kita? Benarkah orang yang lama-lama terasa 'jauh' dan 'asing' padahal sebelumnya adalah seseorang yang benar-benar mengerti kita dapat disebut sebagai sahabat kita? Benarkah seseorang yang tidak dapat meluangkan waktunya untuk bertemu dengan kita di saat kita membutuhkannya, di saat kita ingin bertemu dengannya, sudah pantas kita sebut sahabat?

Gw merasa... bingung dan jujur, agak kosong setelah mendengar hal itu.

Sahabat. Selama ini gw selalu menganggap orang itu sebagai sahabat gw tapi apakah seorang sahabat akan berbohong kepadamu? Apakah seorang sahabat akan menjauh darimu tanpa alasan yang jelas yang kau sendiri tak dapat mengerti? Apa seseorang yang ternyata tak kau kenal sifat aslinya bisa disebut sebagai sahabat?

Jawabannya tidak.

Atau setidaknya, menurut gw jawabannya adalah tidak.

Saat itulah gw baru sadar bahwa ternyata... untuk mendapatkan seorang sahabat adalah sangat sulit. Saat itulah gw baru sadar bahwa ternyata... sampai saat ini, gw belum mempunyai 'sahabat sejati' mungkin hanya tokoh khayalan gw lah yang bisa gw sebut sebagai sahabat gw.

Menyedihkan, memang. Tapi gw lebih merasa nyaman bersama tokoh khayalan itu. Mungkin ini menunjukkan bahwa gw tidak benar-benar waras tapi hey, world is too insane for someone to stay sane, isn't it?

Makanya gw masang gambar Riku dan Sora di Entry ini. Karena persahabatan mereka tetap kokoh walaupun Riku sempet mengkhianati Sora ataupun walaupun mereka selalu bersaing mengenai satu atau lain hal. Gw pengen punya persahabatan yang seperti itu, tapi mungkin... belum waktunya.

Kehidupan di Semester Dua

2010-04-12T03:23:00.000-07:00

Wah, Ga nyangka udah lama banget ngga nulis di blog ini. Hmm... mungkin karena bingung juga sih yaa mau nulis apaan... hhe.

Humm, yang jelas... skarang gw udah semester dua, dan tentu saja mata kuliah saya pun sudah berubah. Selamat tinggal Kimia Organik, Selamat Datang Kimia Sintesis. Selamat tinggal praktikum Anfisman, selamat datang praktikum Botani Farmasi. Selamat tinggal praktikum Fisika Dasar dan Kimia Dasar, selamat datang praktikum Farmasetika dan Kimia Sintesis... dan Berjumpa Lagi dengan praktikum Farmasi Fisika. Hha,

Klo diliat2 sih, sebenernya jumlah praktikum semester satu dengan semester dua itu sama aja... tapi entah mengapa gw merasa kalau semester dua ini lebih... apa ya? Bisa dibilang santai. Mungkin karena kita udh mulai terbiasa praktikum dan mengerjakan lapak + jurnal, atau mungkin juga karena memang lebih santai. Semester dua ini saya praktikum hanya di dua hari--untuk saat ini, karena botani farmasi belum memulai praktikumnya--yaitu hari Kamis dan Jumat.

Kamis adalah Kimia Sintesis dan dilanjutkan dengan Farmasi Fisika II. Untungnya, praktikum Kimia Sintesis ini udh selesai dan praktikum Farmasi Fisika adalah dua minggu sekali jadi saya bisa mendapatkan hari libur di sela2 kepadatan kuliah. Hhe. :D

Dari segi pelajaran... ada yang tambah susah, seperti Farmasi Fisika II yang udh mulai masuk ke itung2an dan Farmasetika dengan Ibu Emma yang sangat strict tapii, praktikumnya di semester ini adalah tambah seru! Farmasetika itu benar2 pelajaran yang seru lhoo klo buat praktikum. Saya amat senang mencampur2 berbagai macam serbuk2 untuk akhirnya dibentuk menjadi trochisi atau pil atau bahkan dimasukkan ke dalam kapsul! Tapiii saya tidak suka melipat kertas perkamen untuk serbuk... merepotkan euy... -__-"

Dari segi sosiaaal... well, I must say it's a lot lot more enjoyable than the first semester. I'm starting to think that I could and would survive in here. :) Ternyata anak2 Farmasi itu pada gila2 dan asik2 untuk diajak main juga dan saya telah mendapatkan dua teman dekat bernama Aldila Indah Refiani dan Okky Sri Purwanti serta seorang pacar... Hhe. :D

Walaupun ada saat2 dimana otak saya berasa mau keluar saking stressnya belajar dan menyelesaikan laporan2 akhir praktikum... tapi semua itu terasa tidak terlalu berat lagi karena bukan hanya saya saja yang merasakan hal itu. Hampir semua anak merasakan hal itu dan kita selalu bisa membuat hal itu sebagai bahan candaan kitaa.

Mungkin emank omongan2 kita menjadi agak2 autis, baca: seriing memasukkan istilah2 sains ke dalam percakapan sehari2, tapii entah kenapa, itu justru menjadi suatu 'ciri khas' yang unik buat anak2 Farmasi. Hhe.

Yaah intinyaaa, saya merasa bersyukurlah telah menemukan teman2 dekat di Farmasi. Semoga dengan dukungan mereka saya akan tetap betah di Farmasi tanpa berkeinginan untuk keluar/pindah dari situ... Amiin. :)

Boiling Point

2010-03-17T03:39:00.000-07:00

Well, this one entry is meant to help people who need references about boiling point, especially on its' definition. Especially lazy people like me and my friends. :P

The boiling point of an element or a substance is the temperature at which the vapor pressure of the liquid equals the environmental pressure surrounding the liquid.

A liquid in a vacuum environment has a lower boiling point than when the liquid is at atmospheric pressure. A liquid in a high pressure environment has a higher boiling point than when the liquid is at atmospheric pressure. In other words, the boiling point of liquids varies with and depends upon the surrounding environmental pressure and elevation. Different liquids boil at different temperatures.

The normal boiling point (also called the atmospheric boiling point or the atmospheric pressure boiling point) of a liquid is the special case in which the vapor pressure of the liquid equals the defined atmospheric pressure at sea level, 1 atmosphere. At that temperature, the vapor pressure of the liquid becomes sufficient to overcome atmospheric pressure and lift the liquid to form bubbles inside the bulk of the liquid. The standard boiling point is now (as of 1982) defined by IUPAC as the temperature at which boiling occurs under a pressure of 1 bar.

The heat of vaporization is the amount of energy required to convert or vaporize a saturated liquid (i.e., a liquid at its boiling point) into a vapor.

Liquids may change to a vapor at temperatures below their boiling points through the process of evaporation. Evaporation is a surface phenomenon in which molecules located near the vapor/liquid surface escape into the vapor phase. On the other hand, boiling is a process in which molecules anywhere in the liquid escape, resulting in the formation of vapor bubbles within the liquid.

(taken from wikipedia.com)

Hari ini adalah ... SIAL

2009-11-24T05:20:00.000-08:00

Seperti apa yang judul telah katakan, hari ini saya adalah sangat siaal saudara-saudara...

Kesialan saya yang pertama berawal dari pagi hari, saya tidak mendapatkan Jarkom bahwa tidak ada Kuliah Anfisman. Well, kesialan yang pertama ini tidak berpengaruh banyak karena saya memang telah memutuskan untuk MEMBOLOS pelajaran Anfisman ituu. Jadii yah, bisa dibilang ini adalah kesialan yang menguntungkan karena berarti absen saya aman dan saya tidaklah ketinggalan materi. Hhe. :p

Kesialan saya yang kedua ada tidak lama setelah saya menjejakan kaki... atau mengemper di depan ruang kuliah Matdas tepatnya... dan sedang mengobrol2 dengan dua anak bernama Okky dan Dila. Si Okky, gadis imoeth amit2 berkerudung yang nampak seperti anak SMP itu adalah bertugas mengerjakan Teori Dasar pada Laporan Akhir Farmasi Fisik kami yang akan dikumpulkan nanti siang dan berhubung dia adalah anak yang baik dan rajin, dia ingin teodas yang lengkap : Lengkap dengan gambar rumus molekul SULFAMERAZIN.

Sayangnya... niat rajin ia tidak direstui oleh Allah karena dia tidak memiliki pulsa untuk Online dan juga tidak punya sumber terpecaya. Ya Sok laah berhubung gw adalah teman yang baiiik... *cieee* jadilah gw meminjamkan HP gw ke Okky. TAPI! Tak lama setelah Okky pegang....

HP gw nge-hang!!!

. . .

Okaaay, awalnya gw kira itu ngehang biasa, secara N-70 mank sering eror. Jadilah dengan santainya gw buka baterai dan gw nyalain lagi. Tapi ternyata... gw mendapat kejutan kedua dari Nokia!!

Layar HP gw udah kayak TV rusak, bersemut !!!

Waduuuh, udah mulai memanik tuh gw! Apalagi pas gw coba2 teteup aja kayak gitu layarnya!! Huwaa sumpah, diantara semua kesialan2 gw, itu adalah kesialan yang paling JLEB! TIDAAAAAK~!!! akhirnya, sampai SEKARANG pun HP gw blum benar!!

sudah pasrah gw soal HP, sekarang soal Praktikum...

Praktikum FarFis kelompok gw hari ini, menurut gw, adalah praktikum terhancur dan tergagal yang pernah kami lakukan. Alasan untuk pendapat ini adalah:

1. Kita adalah tidak tau apa2 mengenai prosedurnya. I mean, of course we know the procedure but we just can't imagine HOW to do it. Jadilaaah, mulainya ajaa kita udah ngaret.

2. Asdos dapet yang agak2 killer. Not that I don't like her or what, but she is really strict. Jadilaah, kita praktikan berada dalam kondisi gugup apalagi Teh Asdosnya ternyata sedang sensi juga... krik krik krik laah kita.

3. Kepala gw sakit! Sumpaah, kayaknya gw mank udah mau sakit ato apaa... yang pasti tadi pas praktikum kepala gw adalah nyut2an. Alhasiiil, gw ga bisa fokus ke percobaan!!

4. Gw ditanya oleh Teh Asdos dan tidak bisa menjawab dengan baik dan benar!! Hanya ada satu pertanyaan untuk ini: Nilai gw jeblok ga ya??

5. Berhubung kita mulainya telaat, jadilah kita selesainya paling akhir dan itu adalah ZONK abis karena kayaknya yang melakukan praktikum itu dan selesai terakhir hanyalah kelompok gw...

6. Pas pengocokan bagian Lapak, gw dapet PEMBAHASAN!! WTF SOAB!!! gimanaa caranyaa cobaaa?! TIDAAAAAK!! GW ADALAH STRESS!!!

Kesialan terkahir gw adalah:
Skarang gw kelaparan tapi tidak bisa memesan makanan lewat sms karena, hello? Handphone broke down, remember?? Ha. Ha. Huff. dan gw adalah malas sekali keluar untuk beli makan karena Jatinangor belakangan ini adalah dingiiin bangeet. Huhuhuuuu... T^T

SOMEONE HELP MEEE!!!
:'(

First Adventure in Bandung... I think?

2009-11-22T03:25:00.000-08:00

Hari iniii... humm, bisa dibilang bahwa gw adalah ber'petualang' hha. Yah, sebenernya dibilang petualangan juga ga begitu tepat dan agak lebay siih tapi berhubung kondisi alam lumayan ekstrem jadi gw menghitungnya sebagai petualangan. Hha! XD

Jadi, semua ini berawal dari menginapnya gw di kostannya Gabris kemarin malam karena gw sdah kemalaman di Bandung dan Damri adalah sudah tidak ada. Nah, si Gabris berkatalah kepada gw bahwa besok pagi dia mau ke Gazibu bersama temannya. Berhubung gw baru sekali ke Gazibu, gw berencana ngikutlaah.

Nah, berhubung jam biologis gw udah mengeset waktu bangun jam 6 pagii, jadilah gw kebangun jam 6 pagi di kostannya Gabris dan sumpaah, udara Bandung dingin banget! Hal yang wajar sih, mengingat sebelumnya adalah hujan seharian... Anyway, gw ma Gabris adalah mengobrol2 sambil menunggu temennya, Putri. Si Gabris mandi sementara gw membaca Girlfriend berhubung gw ga bawa baju ganti dan ga kuat ma airnyaa.

Setelah si Putri dateng, kita berangkatlah ke Gazibuu. Cuma naek satu angkot tapi gw udah lupa lagii angkot apaan... di Gazibuu... BWAH, orang nyee banyak'e pol! udah kayak semua populasi Bandung dimasukkin ke situ!! *lebay* well, at least it feels like that for me! Penuh banget nget nget!!

Si Gabris yang memang berencana mencari baju2 me'mimpin' kita melewati seluk beluk toko2 emperan Gazibu dan setelah berjalan beberapa lamaa, sampailah kita ke bagian yang kanan kiri menjual baju2. Toko2 ini tidak membutuhkan tape untuk memainkan musik karena dengan sendirinya akan terdapat background music, "Marebuan Marebuan Marebuan!!" Yuup, itu adalah suara sang penjual berteriak "Lima Ribuan per bajuu!!" seet, murah beuth kaan... tapi yah, wajar siih soalnya yang dijual juga baju2 bekas. Gw dapet dua rok di sana jadi yaah, lumayanlaah.

Abis dari tuh toko yang jual satu baju lima ribuan, kita menjelajah lagi dan mendapatkan kejutan yang kedua! "Sepuluh ribu empat, sepuluh ribu empat!!" 0.O satu baju harganya 2500?? WOOOW!!! Tentu saja kami pun mengecek tempat ini dan Gabris dengan bahagia nya mulai memilih2 kemeja2. Gw tadinya nyoba nyari juga siih tapi tidak juga ketemu dengan apa yang gw mauu jadi ya sudaah, aku pulang dari toko itu dengan tangan hampa sementara Gabris pulang dengan menenteng empat baju baru lagii.

Dari toko ituu, kita masih berjalan terus lagi dan ketemu toko yang menjual "Sepuluh Ribu Tigaa!!" Yak, seperti yang sudah bisa di tebak, lagi2 si Gabris berhenti dan memilih2 kemeja. Hha, sumpaah, baru kali ini gw ngeliat Gabris semangat belanja bajuu... :P

Gw dan Putri tidak membeli apa2 di toko yang ketiga inii. Dan setelah toko ini, kita memutuskan untuk makan dan karena Putri ingin makan makanan yang enak dan dia adalah yang paling tahu jalan, jadilah kita mengikutinyaa. Ternyata oh ternyataa, tempat makan yang Putri inginkan adalah dekat STASION!! sumpaah, itu adalah pertama kalinya gw menginjak daerah ituu dan melihat angkot2 bertuliskan aneh2. Jegeer, gw sudah agak takut ente bisa pulang, apalagi langit saat itu sudah memendung...

Setelah makaan, kita tidak langsung pulang melainkan jalan2 lagi ke satu daerah yang seperti pasar Jatinegaranya Jakarta. Klo gw ga salah sih namanya Pasar Baru tapi mungkin aja gw salah secara gw ga ngerti jalan sama sekali!! Ke sananya aja kita mesti nyebrangin rel lewat jembatan trus nnti jalan lagi sedikiit. MASALAHNYA, paas kita sedang berjalan itu HUJAN MEMUTUSKAN UNTUK TUUURUUN!!!

Weks, jelaslaah kita kehujanan. Awalnya sih hujan tidak terlalu deras jadi gw dan Gabris adalah satu payung berdua. Mesra, bukaan?? hhe.

Tapi tetap sajaa kehujanaan. :(

Anyway! Ternyata di semacam Mall di Pasar Baru ada yang menjual Takoyaki! Dan Takoyakinya lumayan enaak, walaupun menurut gw masih lebih enak okiroboox...

stelah makan takoyaki dan cuci2 mata buat si Putri--karena selera baju2nya adalah seleranya diaa--kami pun pulang. Namuuun, hujan di luar ternyata semakin menderas, berangin dan parah. Tapi tentu saja hal itu tidak menghalangi kami!! Kami pun tetap berjalan menusuri pinggiran toko2 di tengah hujan air-angin ituu. Kita melewati jembatan penyeberangan namun sialnya, Gabris kepleset!! Dan dia adalah jatuh terduduk!! Auuuch!! But luckily she's fine... I think. =)

Setelah ituu kita naik Angkot yang ke daerah stasion itu lagii dan akhirnya naik angkot Dago-BIP-stasion. Akhirnya gw bisa naik DAMRII!!! Hahahaha!! XDD

Yak, begitulah petualangan uya sehari iniii. Walaupun agak kehujanan tapi tetap saja uya sampai dengan selamat sentausa lagi di Jatinangooor. Hhe.

Mabok Asetat+Alkohol X<

2009-11-20T02:33:00.000-08:00

Praktikum kimia gw hari ini betul-betul berbeda dengan praktikum2 kimia dasar gw lainnya. Adapun hal-hal yang menjadi perbedaannya adalah antara laiiin:
1. Lapak gw belum selesai, terutama bagian teodas dan pembahasannya
2. Tugas pendahuluannya belum gw bikin
3. Jurnal gw masih ada yang belum selesai.

Yak, dari semua kalimat di atas, saya yakiin anda dapat menarik kesimpulan bahwaaa:

MINGGU INI SAYA ADALAH SANGAT MALAS !!!

yup, kesimpulan yang anda dapatkan di atas adalah benar, saudara-saudara. *g* Entah mengapaa... seminggu belakangan ini gw sangat sangat sangat SANGAT malas untuk kuliah. Walaupun bangun tetap pukul lima pagi teng teng dan tetap rajin shalat shubuh, tapi rasanya BERAAAT banget mo siap-siap buat kuliah. Tiap ngeliat jam, klo udah mendekati jam 8 -ambillaah skitar jam 7aan- pasti mood langsung turuuun. Pikirannya adalah: "hh... kuliah lagiii."

Mungkin akan banyak orang yang bertanya, "Lha, berarti sama aja dunn kayak pas SMA!" atau mungkin juga ga ada yang nanya, tapi gw ndiri kadang bertanya2 seperti ituu. hhe. Perasaan SMA ma kuliah sama aja dunn berarti... cuma bedanya disini kita bisa lebih bandel karena tidak ada pengawasan dari orang tua... tapi kalau itu mah berartii kita menyalahkan tanggung jawab yang dikasih ortu, tooh?? hha.

Eniweeei Baaii dee waaaiii baas waaii water waaai,,,

Sebetulnya inti dari entry gw kali ini adalah apa yang terjadi saat praktikum kimia.

Praktikum gw kali ini adalah tentang senyawa-senyawa organik. Jadilah kita harus membuat kurang lebih 7 reaksi yang berhubungan dengan hidrokarbon, asam basa, esterifikasi dan alkohol primeer.

Naah, pas reaksi hidrokarbon, ga ada masalah, semua baik2 sajaa. Eh, pas pembuatan esteeer... banyak terjadi kecelakan!! *jegeer*

. . .

yaah, mungkin gw agak berlebihan. *ahem* anyway, kecelakaan yang gw maksud tidak memakan korban jiwa, alat, hati maupun kulit yang tersayat. Kecelakaan yang gw maksud mungkin sebetulnya adalah tidak berbahaya tapi tetap sajaaa, itu membuat saya cukup pusiing.

Reaksi esterifikasi itu menggunakan Asam Asetat, I-C5H11OH dan kedua-duanya adalah berbau tak sedap menyengat. Dari awal ngambil asam asetat nya aja gw udah agak2 keliyengan, secara itu adalah sudah untuk ke-n kalinya larutan itu diambil dan berhubung anak2 pada rame ngambilnya, pastilah tumpah2an jadii ruang asam itu baunya udaaah... semerbak pisaan euuy.

Karena harus diambilnya 2 mL, tadinya gw bego, cuma bawa tabung reaksi trus pake 'perasaan' kurang lebih 40 tts tuh asam asetat gw masukin ke tabung reaksinya. Eh, pas gw balik ke meja gw dan membaca prosedurnya lagi, kayaknya sih mata gw agak pice ato itu tanda2 gw udah mabok ato apa, ga ngertii, gw tau2 ngebaca bahwa asam asetatnya yang dibutuhkan adalah 1 ml. Jadilah gw ke washtafel dengan niat memisahkan asam asetatnya itu dalam dua tabung.

Eeeeh, pas gw mo misahiiin, tau2 tangan gw rada gemeteran dan si Angga dateng pula, mo nanya reaksi. Pas si angga dateng... tangan gw yang lagi megang satu tabung reaksi berisi asam asetat selip dan tumpahlah larutan asam itu ke tangan gw!! sumpaah, bauuu ABIS! Udah gitu tangan gw jadi gatel!! setelah gw cuci pun baunya ga ilang!! jadilah gw tambah keliyengan... tapi apa daya, praktikum harus terus berjalan. *halaah*

baliklah gw ke ruang asam buat ngambil lagi asam asetat. Untungnya kali ini berhasil. Trus temen gw, Dimas, ngambilin I-C5H11OH nya itu buat gw, berhubung gw jg ngambilin dia asam asetat, tapi ternyata, baunya minyak pisang itu juga ga enak! mirip2 alkohol gitu... dan pas udah dicampur ke asam asetat... gw yakin klo gw bikin parfum dengan aroma itu, pasti laku buat ngusir tikus... hha. XD

Jadilaah keliyengan gw menjadi-jadii. di saat gw mikir udah ga bakal ada yang salah lagii, tau-tau temen gw ada yang 'nyenggol' gelas ukur berisi sisa asam asetat sehingga tumpahlaah larutan terkutuk bau asem najis amit-amit itu ke MEJA GW!!! Sumpaaah, ampe selese praktikum, ga ilang2 tuh bau asam asetaaat!

Bahkan gw udah cuci tangan pake air, sabun, sama handy clean aja tetep ga ilang2!! Gila... gw beneran mabok banget tadii selese praktikum... untungnya ga lama kemudian selesai, jadi gw dapat menghirup udara segar--yang kelewat segar mendekati dingin berhubung lagi ujan--di luar dengan segera.

Kagak bakal mau lagi deeh gw, deket-deket sama asam asetat setelah peristiwa ini...
Huhuhu...
:'<

First Entry!

2009-11-19T02:47:00.000-08:00

Ahem. So, my first entry...

Hm... aslinya, gw ga tau sih apakah gw bakal bertahan mengurus 'blog' ini. Soalnya... gw juga baru bikin LiveJournal dan jujuuur, tuh blog gw pake buat surfing di komunitasnya doank. Mpe skarang, postingan gw yang disana baru ada dua dan dua-duanyaa adalah tidak penting. -then again, rata2 blog mank isinya ga penting, kan? hhe-

Anywaaaays. First entry biasanya isinya apaa siiih?? gw juga bingung. *garuk2* perkenalaaan?? blah. nampak tak penting tapi berhubung gw binguuung jadi yaah, mo diapakan lagii. hhe.

Nama gw uyaa, gw adalah seekor, eeh seorang maksudnya, Mahasiswi di Fakultas Farmasi Universitas Padjajaran, Bandung. Umur gw adalah 18 tahuun dan gw adalah anak kedua dari tiga bersaudara. Selain sebagai mahasiswi, pekerjaan sampingan gw adalah menulis fanfiction tapii belakangan otak gw lagi miskiin ide kreatif selain membedah-bedah dan titrasiii jadi nyaa pekerjaan sampingan gw saat ini sedang terhambat.

Gw baru saja membeli peliharaan berupa hamster jenis Siberian dan gw bakal bikin tag khusus buat Hamster-hamster gw karena gw merasa mereka sangaat lucu dan patut diceritakan. Ngomong-ngomong soal hamster, gw punya empat tapi belakangan ini nambah lima karena hamster cewek gw baru saja beranak! *g*

Aheem. Truuus... humm, apalagi yak?? Gw bingung mo berceloteh apa kalii inii jadi gw rasa cukup sampai disini dahulu. :) Klo gw ada idee ato hanya sedang ingin rantiiing gw pasti akan mencorat-coret celoteh gw lagi disiiiniiii. hhe.